A moment for reflection

It has been a year since my move out to California.  Here is how my life has developed:

I have learned to stand up for my dreams…aye, my goals.  Even if I didn’t fully believe or live by them at the time, I knew I had to start somewhere, had to just start declaring.  One of the most difficult goals I explored a great deal this year  was learning how to be alone, with my artwork; focused.   I have learned that most Friday and Saturday nights are better spent listening to some good tunes, enjoying a home cooked meal, and working on my art.  Most important was finally recognizing how wretched I would act on a night out drinking with my peers and acknowledging that my brain was simply trying to get my attention, blinking a bright red warning message that screamed “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU SHOULD BE WORKING ON YOUR ART”.  A year ago I was all mixed up and headed down a very long and dark path to nowhere; sure, there was company but, as they say, misery loves company.

In this past year, I made it across the country, settled into a new home, befriended a whole new family who call themselves my “California family” and with them I know I will always be welcome.  I found a job with the craziest of the crazies, moved to Los Angeles, LOS ANGELES, and I am now working at one of the only ceramics studios in the greater L.A. area as a teacher and assistant, making my own art and selling it (www.siximposserousthings.etsy.com).  This weekend, I am putting together a sidewalk sale for the studio and next weekend I am creating my own art opening/gallery in my garden.  IN MY GARDEN.  How many people did I tell in the past year that I was going to have a garden? A ton. Plus a while mess of strangers.

The most important lesson learned: My family is proud of me and they support me – words can’t even hope to describe what that means to me.

On being scared:  I get scared ALL the time.  But I read over this last paragraph and there is nothing I should be disappointed about, nothing I feel I would go back and change.  It is a scary and often lonely road, the road you create, but it is worth it. 100%.

 

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